Just Wondering

Every now and then I like to relax in my comfortable Lazy Boy chair and contemplate what’s going on in the world and how it affects my life. Being retired gives people that option. Obviously it is beyond me to change any of the following thoughts, but perhaps there is someone reading this who has the ability and power to do just that. Here’s what’s running through my mind on this overcast, rainy day:

Just wondering why we have so many food recalls, particularly with meat. We never had any recalls when I was growing up in the 1940s. Maybe we were eating contaminated food back then, but never knew it. We never had to worry about defective baby car seats, because there weren’t any. Since we are all about quality, why do we keep having recalls on children’s items, such as cribs? 

Just wondering why we keep importing lead-laden products from China. The latest products to be concerned about are women’s leather purses. Based on experience, let’s conclude that everything coming out of China has elements of lead and appropriate warnings have to be issued. Therefore, can anyone tell me why we are still importing these contaminated products?

Just wondering if phone calls to customer service departments are really being recorded for “training and quality assurance.” Based on some of the assistance we get from certain phone jockeys, I doubt it. It seems that every company has utilized this recording, but I suspect that there is little, if any, follow-up on the recordings, if in fact, there is a recording.

Just wondering if there are actually some people with rotary dial phones. Certain recorded customer service lines state, “Please hold for the next representative if you have a rotary dial phone.” I wonder if these people also have a scrub board in place of a washing machine.

Just wondering why health care and education form the nucleus of Baldrige applicants and winners. Don’t manufacturing and service companies want to improve their internal processes? Once the Baldrige process was opened to health care and education it was as if a floodgate of applicants was released.

Just wondering if the Detroit Lions will ever in their lifetime appear in a Super Bowl. Heck, even the former lowly Saints are in the Super Bowl—and they are an expansion team. And if the Lions ever have a winning season what will late night comedians do for joke material. 

Just wondering if anyone ever purchases that E85 fuel. It’s made from corn and, as such, production of this substitute for gasoline has raised the price of corn and popcorn. There are few stations that stock it. What a joke. Wasn’t E85 all about improving the quality of the environment? Maybe the environment is not ready for E85.

Just wondering why organizations that are downsizing find it necessary to escort long-term employees out the door with armed guards. Are these employees that dangerous? What could they possibly extract from the company that is so valuable? Most companies have a mission statement indicating that “Employees are our most important asset.” Yeah right.

Just wondering what “Blu-ray” is. I just learned about high-definition television or HDT, so don’t boggle my mind with anything else. Please.

Just wondering what prompts ice fishermen to travel onto ice that is in a melting stage.  I’m sure during the next few weeks we in the Midwest will be hearing about some anglers floating down the river on an ice floe.  I say let them go all the way to the St. Lawrence Seaway. Maybe that will discourage them in the future.

Just wondering why so many people are enamored with Facebook. I had my own page for a while but people whom I had never been friends with while growing up now want to be my friend. Of course reading someone’s Facebook status and learning that he or she woke up and then spent the morning trimming their nose hairs has little appeal to me. On the other hand, trying to quit Facebook gives you a guilt complex, because the site almost infers that you are abandoning all your friends. Friends? I hardly knew most of the people who want to be my Facebook friend.

Just wondering why President Obama goes tie-less. I want my president to dress appropriately, especially in the Oval Office, and not appear as if he is going to a Jimmy Buffet concert. Say what you want about President Bush, but he always looked presidential.

Just wondering why teachers and professors are not measured based on accomplishments in the classroom. If there is no level of learning taking place why should someone be allowed to retain his or her job? Many of us as consultants are measured on presentation, deliverables, and follow-up.  Shouldn’t teachers be subjected to the same criteria, and if there are any deficiencies shouldn’t they be put out to pasture just as those in the corporate world? 

Just wondering who would win in a no-holds-barred cage fight between the Michelin Man and the Pillsbury Dough Boy. My vote is for the Michelin Man. The Dough Boy should have Mr. Clean stand in for him.

Just wondering if anyone has ever been arrested for removing a tag from a pillow or a mattress since, supposedly, doing so is illegal and “punishable by law.” And if arrested, do you get a padded cell?

Just wondering if anyone who subscribes to Quality Digest Daily reads my column? And if so do they consider me cerebral, humorous, interesting, and compelling or just a whacko who should be locked up in a tagless-pillow padded room and forced to read Facebook entries all day from people who have rotary dial phones?

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